Normalcy

In a sense, being in college is all about freedom. There is no point in time in anyone's life where anything is as variably as important. Sure, you read the New York Times, and see all of the insanely prestiguous couples getting married, and make a mental note to yourself saying this is why you're making an effort, so that you have a shot at getting your nuptial intents published. But everyone gets a college degree. Everyone. -- Okay, maybe that's not true.

I come from Montgomery County, Maryland where this is true. You've failed if you have not graduated from a four-year school and done something with yourself. Life is just too simple otherwise. You go to a great public high school and have to do something with that.

I love this and I hate this. Somedays I just want to kick back and do absolutely nothing. And it's not like I don't. I have fun, I'm not claiming to be el niño perfecto. But I do want to not have to justify that. I want to blissfully be able to shut down at anytime. I want to be able to enjoy looking and feeling good. Enjoy it in every sense that the word enjoy can provide. I know that I can, but my conditioned mind won't let me. I've gotten this far.

I feel that this is an intense ramble. But I've calculated out that I only have 50-60 good years left. --If I am lucky I will die sometime in my 80's in the 2060's. It's really not at as far away as it seems. So here I am trying to record every single word that I can, and when I'm older, look back at what my thoughts were, and how life was different.

College was fun. College was when none of your friends were married, life was boundless and if you wanted to live, you could really live.

I believe that this is me telling me to live. Or in more vulgar (testosteronal) terminology, stop being such a pussy.